How To Rewire Your Brain For Happiness

Our brains naturally hold on to negative experiences more than positive ones. These 3 strategies will help you learn to focus on the positive.

In Hardwiring Happiness: The New Brain Science of Contentment, Calm, and Confidence, neuropsychologist Rick Hanson says our brain is like Velcro for negative experiences and Teflon for positive ones. That built-in negativity bias helps keep us safe.
This means that we readily notice and internalize anything negative that happens to us during the course of a day, while glossing over anything positive because we're busy solving problems or scanning for something to worry about. For example, as entrepreneurs, we often tend to overestimate the threats and underestimate the opportunities for our businesses.
In business relationships with partners, employees or colleagues, trust is often a delicate fiber that connects us and can easily be broken. As Hanson puts it, "Uncomfortable experiences are immediately fast-tracked into memory stores: Once burned, twice shy ... Strong dislikes are acquired faster than strong likes ... Something bad about a person is better remembered than something good."

Rewiring Our Brain

It pays to become adept at knowing how to reshape our brain so we counteract our default to the negative. In his book, Hanson reveals how to do just that—how to train our brain to hardwire all the positive experiences, to "take in the good" that happens every day in our life. This involves turning a positive event into a positive experience.
We can make this happen if we take 10, 20 or 30 seconds to savor the positive moment. And there are many of them during the course of a day, Hanson says, but we just don't notice them. These brief seconds of paying attention to what has happened and relishing it makes the positive experience sink in so it can develop into a neural structure. The more we do this, the better we become at balancing our hardwired negativity bias with an ability to take in the good.
Drawing on years of research in neuroscience, Hanson shows that to build inner strength into our brain, we need to meet three core needs: safety, satisfaction and connection. Learning which positive experiences can satisfy these core needs every day goes a long way toward helping us cultivate positive emotions and hardwiring contentment and peace so we can focus on a successful life.
The following three tactics, which help fulfill your core needs, can help you concentrate on the positive.

Practice Being Calm

You can boost your sense of safety by regularly focusing on experiences that make you feel calm. Calm is an attitude of composure that lets us function at our best in stressful, harried or charged situations. It's means moving away from a crisis-driven mindset.
We often miss opportunities to practice calmness because we're used to being "on" all the time. For example, calmness isn't rushing from one airport gate to another when there's ample time for making our connecting flight. It's taking a real break from your business during the day to have an uninterrupted meal. It's waking up an hour earlier so you don't have to rush through traffic. It's giving your child an extra 10 minutes' of peaceful attention in the morning.
Create such moments during your day to experience calmness, and intentionally focus on the experience for a few seconds to relish how it feels. Repeatedly internalizing experiences that bring a sense of calm to your life helps you build that emotional muscle so you're better able to face situations in your business or personal life without feeling pressured or rattled by them.

Raise Your Satisfaction Awareness

When you're feeling satisfied, you're more likely to experience such feelings as gratitude, gladness, accomplishment and contentment. These are powerful antidotes to the negativity bias in our brain. So it's important to become more aware of what satisfaction means for you, and then take the time to savor the experience when it happens.
For instance, it may be closing a sale or completing a project ahead of time. Or it may be as simple as learning something new every day. You need to be clear about whatever it is that brings you satisfaction so you can create more of these opportunities but, more important, so you can savor them when they do happen.
If you need inspiration in this regard, consider how Rich Jones, CEO of Open Watch, a company that builds tech solutions for independent media groups and nonprofits, goes about it. In "Hacker Lifestyle: How I Feel Satisfied With Every Day," Jones offers a simple three-pronged approach that works for him: "Every day," he says, "I simply force myself to do 3 things: Get paid. Get fit. Make something cool." What are the three things that make you feel satisfied as an entrepreneur?

Value The People In Your Life

You can strengthen your sense of feeling connected by regularly focusing on experiences during the day in which you feel cared about or valued. You can also focus on experiences that make you feel like a good person, such as when you feel compassion or when you're doing something kind for others.
Marshall Goldsmith, voted one of North America's top 50 Thinkers in 2011 by the Harvard Business Review, says that when asking older people who are dying what advice they'd have for others, one of the themes that consistently comes up is to focus on friends and family. You may have wonderful business associates now, but when you're 95 years old and you look around your death bed, very few of your business associates or fellow employees will be there waving goodbye. Your friends and family will probably be the only people who care for you and be there for you in the end.
As psychologist William James once said, "The deepest principle in human nature is the craving to be appreciated." Don't let the daily preoccupations with your business cause you to miss the appreciation you receive from those closest to you.


Bruna Martinuzzi is the founder of Clarion Enterprises Ltd. and the author of two books, Presenting with Credibility: Practical Tools and Techniques for Effective Presentations and The Leader as a Mensch: Become the Kind of Person Others Want to Follow.

Insights from an app-developer veteran: Think simple, low-risk

The press loves an “app millionaire” — entrepreneurs that make big money as their products attract venture capital, or the assimilating hands and deep pockets of a technology giant like Apple or Google.

Most developers will never live in that world.

The majority will make their living as contractors or employees working on other people’s apps, but some make a living writing their own apps and releasing them in the various stores. I have been living off my own apps for a decade now. From the Treo 600, through the iPhone revolution and on to the growing popularity of Android.
At the risk of sounding like a hoary old man of the hills, I’ve seen a lot of changes and been astonished at the ways in which the market has developed. But some things have remained true throughout the 10 years I’ve been running Hobbyist Software, and I expect they’ll go on being true long after I’ve hung up my keyboard. So here are a handful of tips and observations for the solo developer.

Satisfy your own needs

My most popular apps are ones that I’ve developed for myself to satisfy my own needs with devices that excite me. If you want a capability on your device, chances are there are other people thinking the same thing. Having a problem you want to solve for yourself means that you are more committed to it and actually understand it. It’s also a lot more fun.

Take feedback and act on it

Without exception it has been feedback from highly engaged users which has allowed my apps to keep developing over the years, to improve and stay fresh. I respond to most customer emails myself and aim to do so quickly. This seems to have a lasting halo effect as customers recommend my apps to their friends. Many people are surprised and very pleased to get an email from the real developer rather than a support minion.

Keep it simple – but not too simple

You’ll typically get most feedback from the highly technical users who want lots of complicated features and options. These guys are great, they have some killer ideas, but they are not the majority of your users. In order to keep the broader base happy, you need to keep things simple. Palm OS used to talk about ‘the zen of Palm.’ They obsessed about letting users act in as few taps as possible. Apple has embraced this desire for simplicity — though, with Apple, making things beautiful can sometimes get in the way of achieving the goal.

Looks matter

When I started developing, apps were called applications, and we cared more about what they did than how they looked. Times have changed. For your app to be a success, it needs to look good. Spend that bit of extra time (and maybe money, if graphic skills aren’t your thing) to give it a bit of polish.

You can’t predict success

Apps are like pop songs. You write the app, you polish it and you release it. You don’t know whether it will be a hit or flop. That is true even after your first successful app. Most pop bands are one-hit-wonders, and most developers will struggle to follow initial success. I had low expectations for the app that would become my most successful project, and others that I was super-excited about disappeared without a trace. You do your best, release your app, then move on if you need to.

Small is good

I have been accused of lacking ambition, but I like my small, low-risk approach. I don’t have employees, I have never spent more than a few thousand pounds to develop, design, and launch an app. Many developers are working towards a big launch on borrowed money, hiring an expensive team of rock star developers and publicists, hoping and hanging on for that ever elusive venture capital or big tech buy-out. I look at most of those app ideas and wonder why they didn’t just build their app in the evenings, launch it, and see what happens. Most will disappear without a trace, but a good idea that fulfills a need will gradually find a market. And probably has as much chance of hitting it big as any other decent app, with a lot less risk.

Rob Jonson is a self-taught programmer who has been releasing apps under the Hobbyist name for 10 years. Rob makes his living selling apps (including the best selling VLC Remote and VLC Streamer) direct to customers via app stores. Rob made his first app, Butler (a no.1 best seller), on Palm OS for the Treo600 (arguably the first smart phone). Rob managed to make the transition to iOS with the best selling VLC Remote, released in 2008, the earliest days of the App Store. Along the way, he’s released apps for Palm OS, Web OS, Android, Windows Phone, iOS, Mac, and Windows. One of his early cult Palm OS apps even influenced the key ‘Just type’ feature of Web OS. You can find out more about his apps and Hobbyist Software.

Going live: Tips for first-time corporate speakers

You’ve been asked to speak at an upcoming business meeting and have learned that some important people will be in the audience. There is a lot riding on this. And the reality is this presentation could open doors for you, including the exit!

Speaking in public is a natural requirement of most corporate positions. It also is a leading fear for many people. Yet, with a little preparation and practice, you can manage that fear and present like a rock star — delivering for your company, elevating your position and avoiding being shown to the door!

Follow these eight tips and you will surely succeed as a first time corporate speaker:

1. Embrace the anxiety. Most people will tell you to relax before giving a public speech. But that’s easier said than done. Public speaking activates your adrenal glands and creates nervous energy. Take a step back and reassure yourself that what you are experiencing is normal.Harness that energy and make it work for you, not against you.Make a conscious decision to use purposeful movements, meaningful gestures, and direct and continuous eye contact.
2. Open with a grabber. This is one of the most common tips for the first-time corporate speaker. Don’t start by saying, “My name is ____, and I’m here to talk about …” Someone’s (hopefully) already introduced you and your topic. Your job is to start your presentation with a story, startling statistic, a little known fact — something that will break the ice and engage your audience.
3. Fact-example-fact. This is a good way to structure the points of your speech to drive them home. State a fact. Then give an example that illustrates that fact and its implications. Then state the fact again, in a different way.
4. Employ visuals. They say a picture’s worth 1,000 words. If you have specific audiovisual elements that can illustrate your point, use them. But be careful with this one. Some think that having a slideshow with their presentation will automatically make it more engaging. In fact, if used poorly, any audiovisual can distract from the overall message. Use slides when they are relevant to what you are saying, maximizing the impact of your message.
5. Include soundbites. This is the Twitter age. If people like what you say, they’ll share it with the world, but only if it’s memorable and brief. Format the takeaways of your speech as short but interesting soundbites that encourage people to pass them on.
6. Practice, practice, practice. Your speech works on paper, but how does it sound out loud? Practice your speech out loud a minimum of five times before you deliver it. The first three times, you may find yourself editing your speech and honing your content, determining what works and what doesn’t. Once you’ve got your message in shape, it’s time to focus on delivery. Find a small group of colleagues, friends or family members ask for their honest feedback. The better prepared you are, the more confident you will be when you speak at that all-important meeting.
7. Have a conversation. Instead of talking at your audience, talk to them. Share with them what you want them to know, why it’s important, and most importantly, “what’s in it for them.” Use a little humor where appropriate. Be authentic and you’re sure to connect with your listeners.
8. Be passionate. This is the most important tip: Get excited about the subject you’re speaking about! Your audience will be as engaged as you. When your excitement is genuine, you will convey a “sit up and listen” energy, and your enthusiasm will be contagious.

Whether you’re addressing a room of 10 or a stadium of 10,000, these tips for the first time corporate speaker can help you deliver an engaging and memorable presentation. With a little preparation and practice, you’ll gain confidence and discover that speaking in public an opportunity that can take your career to the next level.

Stephanie Scotti is a strategic communication adviser specializing in high stake presentations. She has 25-plus years experience of coaching experience and eight years teaching presentation skills for Duke University. She has provided presentation coaching to over 3000 individuals in professional practices, Fortune 500 companies, high-level government officials and international business executives. Stephanie holds a bachelor’s in speech communications and education and a master’s in organizational communications and business. Learn more at ProfessionallySpeaking.net and ProfessionallySpeakingBlog.com.

How to Achieve Your 2014 Leadership Goals

101It’s that time of year when many of us, with the best of intentions will write a leadership development plan, or establish goals for the upcoming year. Unfortunately, most of us will fail to achieve those goals.

Why? We fail for a lot of reasons, most importantly, we underestimate how hard it is to change behavior.

There’s others reasons too. We often set high-level, nebulous leadership goals such as “be more strategic” or “be a better leader” without having a way to measure our progress towards achieving that goal. There’s no accountability, no way to see if we are making progress, and no motivation to keep trying.

I recently attended a conference where leadership-development guru, author and coach Marshall Goldsmith was a keynote speaker.

He shared a technique that’s he’s been using for years that helps him achieve his goals. At the end of his presentation, he asked if anyone was interested in participating in some research (for 10 days) using a similar technique to leave a business card. He said most people won’t — and if they did, they wouldn’t stick with it.

Well I did — I haven’t given up — and I’m loving the results! Here’s how it works:

Step 1: Establish your goals
Establish a number of daily, behavioral objectives — things that you have an opportunity to do every day and can answered with a number (i.e., 1 to 7 scale). It’s important that your establish your own objectives — things that are important to you — but here’s a list to choose from if you need some examples or help getting started:

1. I did my best to really listen to others.
2. I had positive interactions with others.
3. I did my best to be happy.
4. I set measurable goals for the day.
5. I did my very best to achieve my goals.
6. I added value today.
7. I inspired someone today.
8. I helped someone else be successful or solve their own problem.
9. I was engaged in my work.
10. My work had meaning.

Step 2: Daily follow-up and measurement
There are a number of ways to do this. You can have a good friend call you or e-mail every day and ask you to score yourself on each question. No long-winded analysis, beating yourself up, or excuses — just a number. You or your friend should keep track of your answers on a spreadsheet.
Or, you can use the tool that I’m using for the research. You are welcome to participate in Marshall’s study using simply providing your e-mail to this link. There’s even an accountability app that does the emails and scoring for you.

I’m not a behavioral psychologist, but I could guess why this seems to working so well. When I first started answering the questions, my scores were pretty low. However, responded to that darn e-mail every day has motivated me to really pay attention — and try harder — to things that may have gotten overlooked without the reminder.

Although I haven’t seen my results yet, I know my numbers are going up. And just like when you step on the scale when dieting and see those numbers go down, it’s motivating to see the measurable results!
I wish you success and happiness in 2014!

Dan McCarthy is the director of Executive Development Programs at the University of New Hampshire. He writes the award-winning leadership-development blog Great Leadership and is consistently ranked as one of the top digital influencers in leadership and talent management. He’s a regular contributor to SmartBlog on Leadership. E-mail McCarthy.